REDMOND, WASHINGTON – Microsoft Corporation (MSFT) and subsidiary Minecraft announced youth initiatives for the summer of 2016. CEO Satya Nadella discussed the high demand of child laborers to a group of middle school students:
“We’re excited to announce Minecraft Congo Adventures, the only official Minecraft summer camp where you can all learn the 40-thousand year old art of mining. In addition to mining you will have the luxury of immersing yourself into new cultures and languages in a way that few young people ever experience. At Microsoft we like to say that the only thing more exciting for children than harvesting fake mines is harvesting the real thing.”
The move, lauded by commodity experts, is expected to bolster the tech-giant’s cobalt supplies which drive many of the worlds gadgets. Parents will need to apply by March 31st submitting the application form, non-disclosure agreement (NDA), non-compete agreement, liability waivers and a credit card authorization form. Lucky children who get accepted to the program will experience cultural immersion, rigorous exercise and the opportunity working with animals including donkeys, ponies and canaries. Satya Nadella cautioned children that while mining is fun it can also be dangerous, however there would be no guarantee of a folk song written for them should they perish.